Happy Halloween!

It's one of our favorite days of the year. The day that the Hutt actually lightens up for a change and lets us wear costumes. The day that all the t.v. channels show horror movies and everyone believes in ghosts, zombies, and monsters. The internet has a wealth of seasonal videos for this time of year. Here are a few of our favorites, though we admit these are more funny than frightening.

Song to Wear Pants To's "Zombie Ninjas"

AVbyte's "The Walking Dead"

Jonathan Coulton's "re: Your Brains"

Zebra is almost certainly brainless

Seriously, we think that any zombie that tries to feed on Zebra will starve to death (starve to second death?). This is the interaction that we overheard today.

Patron: I'd like information on braille.

Zebra: What kind of braille?

Duh. Is there any other kind

Seriously, has anyone ever heard of any other kind of braille?

Poor starving zombie. No food for you at Tartarus

 

No dog required

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
I'm playing with your rabies.

In case you were wondering, that thing that looks like half an ear of corn is sort of what the rabies virus actually looks like. So, literally playing with rabies.

 

Mr. Not-so-clean

The Hutt admonished the staff today to clean out the refrigerator. Every shelf was full and most of the food in there was old. 

"Take out or label anything that belongs to you," said Shoes. "After lunches I'm going to throw away anything without a label."

Now, this has happened at Tartarus before. Usually it results in a nearly empty fridge. This is what the refrigerator looked like shortly before closing today.

This is clean?

And why is there so much year-old soda in there?

 A few things are gone. Like cheesey potatoes. But this was still in there.

See all that sediment? Disgusting.

 

It's Mo Monday!

We're learning that arguing with Mo is an exercise in futility. No matter what we say to him, he's certain he is always right. This delusion is reinforced when, occasionally, he is. We told him he would look ridiculous riding this dragon like a horse. Instead, he looks awesome.

Heigh-ho Dragon!

Let's talk about Spoof

Whoopity-doo!  It's time for evaluations at Tartarus. In a normal workplace your annual evaluation is a chance for your boss to acknowledge the things that you do well and gently remind you of some things that you could do better. Not at Tartarus.

At Tartarus you never know what will happen when you get evaluated. The Hutt may act as if you are the best employee ever. Or you may be treated like the lowest scum on the planet. Or you might be Spoof.

Today was Spoof's evaluation. The Hutt spent the entire time talking about other people, some of whom don't even work at Tartarus any more.  When Spoof said, "Excuse me. This is my evaluation. Please talk about me" the Hutt kind of squirmed.

"Uh, yeah," said the Hutt. Then it proceeded to talk about other people again. When the Hutt finally did talk about Spoof, the only criticism it gave was "When you're assigned to work the desk, you spend too much time actually at the desk."

What?!

We can only conclude that the Hutt is actually afraid of Spoof. We cannot guarantee that we will not use this knowledge for nefarious purposes.

Let the games begin

Really? Really?!

At Tartarus, we post signs in the building warning patrons about upcoming holidays and such when we will be closed. On the surface this is a very sensible plan. If only it were being done in a sensible way. 

Three of these signs got posted this week: two on Monday and one today. One of Monday's signs warned about a staff education day November 17th. A month in advance seemed a little premature but not particularly worth mentioning. 

Then the Hutt had Neppy post another one. The second sign told people we would be closed for Thanksgiving. Now, by our count that sign is posted SIX weeks in advance. More than a little ridiculous.

This seemed sensible to you Hutt?

The cherry on top is today's closing sign, reminding people that we close for Veteran's Day. It doesn't take a very big brain to realize that Veteran's Day actually happens before either of the other two. So why wait to hang that sign?