It's Mo Monday!

In typical Mo fashion, everywhere we go Mo declares himself king. In this case, he was determined to be king of the beach. Luckily, it was a slightly gray day and the beach was pretty well deserted. So congratulations Mo. You are king of rocks, kelp, and driftwood. 
 

The Hutt has left the building!

Some part of us thought it would never happen, that the whole thing was a cruel prank. But it's true. They Hutt is gone and we couldn't be more thrilled.

 Join us in a celebratory song.

 

I don't think that's how it works

If you've ever been any sort of boss, manager, or department head, you're probably familiar with the concept of delegating work (If this is a foreign concept to you, delegating is when you have too much work to do so you assign some of your tasks to an underling). Delegating work is a pretty useful system and one of the perks of being in charge. It is, however, an exclusively 1 to 1 system. Yet Shoes seems to think it is acceptable to delegate on someone else's behalf.

The story goes like this. We have new summer help arriving. They will be assigned to different departments. One will be working for Spoof. Yet in the email regarding the new staff, Shoes assigned Opie to train the new guy. Opie who, technically, works for Spoof. Spoof was, let's just say, less than pleased. Confronted with this, Shoes would only say "sometimes we have to delegate our tasks." We would like to know what gives Shoes the right to act on Spoof's behalf.

To Shoes, all we can say is:

I'm not in the market for dysentary today

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
I want the rabies for a dollar.

Though with such an exotic selection, why would you pick rabies?

It's Mo Monday!

Mo has, on multiple occasions, declared his intention to rule the entire world. To that end he's been trying to recruit a variety of animals to join his army. Most recently, this has meant sea creatures. We can only be glad that he doesn't know the difference between real animals and statues.

Word of the Week

It's time for a new feature. Ever had a week that could be summed up in a single word? Check in on Saturdays to see what word best describes the week we just had.

The word this week was:

HOSED

Dictionary.com defines hosed as:

1. cheated, tricked, or taken advantage of.
2. defeated decisively.
3. rejected.

 

 

What a great boss

Imagine you are a boss. You are greeting your employees by name (probably because you got scolded for blatantly favoring certain ones). You don't immediately see one person. Do you:
a) go find said person and greet them to their face

or

b) yell "Good Morning employee X" across the building and hope said employee hears you

?

GOOD MORNING!!!!

Maybe it's morse code

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
We're doing different math so we don't even need the flashlight.

Must be one high-tech flashlight

It's Mo Monday!

When your nemesis is an evil squirrel you often don't feel safe. Attacks can come from above, below, any direction really. You get the idea, though, that if you can get inside you'll be safe. Squirrels don't have apposable thumbs, so surely they can't open doors. Right? 

Right?

We're not so sure anymore. Mo spent several hours recently examining door knobs. It's only a matter of time before he figures out some method of opening them. Then no one will be safe.

Did you just say that?

We'd like to introduce a new feature that will be appearing on here occasionally. We call it "Did you just say that?", where we list three things we've heard our coworkers say to patrons. Things you really shouldn't say.

Today's list actually all come from the same person.

1. The government is evil.

2. You're gross.

3. Then you wouldn't have anything to complain about.


This is how we imagine patrons responding:

Put your face right here, coworker

Who keeps severed limbs around

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
She made a face at us so I gave her the arm.
 

No one seems happy about that

It's Mo Monday!

Curiosity may have killed the cat, but it also trapped Mo. We were at a local restaurant that had counter seating featuring stools. These stools had a hole in the center. Mo is apparently to curious for his own good. He poked his head up through that hole and found himself quite stuck. We must admit we laughed at him a good long while before helping him out.
 

They didn't have them in fun- or king-size

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
You could put bite-sized monkeys in there.

He seems awfully happy to be eaten.

It's Mo Monday!

Mo sneaked along on our monthly bowling night. First, he was outraged when we told him he couldn't bowl without shoes and they don't make bowling shoes is squirrel sizes.

And nothing he could do was going to make them fit.

He raged about eating everyone in the place. He claimed that the lanes were his own personal snack bar. Luckily, the alley had these handy signs. And for all his faults, Mo can be kind of a stickler for following signs.

No snacks today, Mo.