2014 in review

2014 was a pretty good year on Falling Down the Death Stare. Sure we've been angry. That's pretty much our standard emotion. But we've had some laughs too. Check out some of our favorites this year.

Our favorite Mo Post
Rabid Mo, master of time.

Our favorite Further Adventures of Spoof and Speck
What you might call the classic chase.

Our favorite Stuff Out of Context
The American Donkey Love story. Who doesn't love donkeys in love?

Our favorite new character
The Murlhaug, of course.
Check out his first appearance here.

The most visited post 
It's a close call, but probably this one.


 
Is your favorite post not on this list? Just let us know in the comments.

Are you carrying roadkill?

Working with the public, we see all kinds of crazies. Nothing beats the fellow we saw today, though. Imagine this.

Firstly, the guy was built like Moe from the Simpsons. Skinny, kind of hunched over.

Like this

His hair was scraggly and he had no teeth. He wore a beat-up, fake leather jacket and a pair of paint-spattered pants that he had cuffed into capris.

They were somehow even less sylish and attractive than these

And he seemed to be carrying a plush racoon as a purse.

Just give this guy a strap, apparently.

As if he wasn't weird enough just by appearance, this is what he said over the course of about 3 minutes.
"I'm a trust-fund baby."

"My husband took away all of my quarters."


We are perplexed.

 

It's Mo Monday!

We've been talking about New Years Resolutions and Mo has gotten in on the act. He informs us that he has resolved to raise a mighty animal army in 2015. He's already started the membership drive with this bear.

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to you and yours from Spoof, Speck, Lil' Kelly, and Mo.
 

We got Griswolded

Yes, you read that right. We said Griswolded. Remember National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation? How Clark Griswold was planning to use his Christmas bonus to have a pool installed and then found out his "bonus" was a fruit-of-the-month club? (Seriously, if you have no idea what we are talking about, go and watch that movie. You won't regret it.) That totally just happened to us. Almost exactly.

It's left us a little crazed

Here's the set-up:

Every Christmas we get a gift from our Board. Call it a present, a Christmas bonus, whatever. It's always money. Specifically, it's something called Chamber Bucks, which can be used like cash at any Chamber of Commerce business (though it turns out most chamber businesses have never heard of the program and won't accept the bucks, making them significantly less useful than real money. Almost useless really). Usually we receive our bonus in early December. 

This year, around the time of the annual gift delivery (now about two weeks ago), a member of our board dropped off a basket of fruit. In the basket was a single card from the board, thanking us for all our hard work. That was it. No Chamber Bucks. Just a dozen oranges, half a dozen bruised apples, two pears, a couple pounds of grapes, and some cheap chocolate. 

This is a gift?

We were OUTRAGED. Some of us count on that bonus to buy our Christmas dinner (we are significantly underpaid, compared to the industry standards but that's a story for another time).

Our story ends much like Clark's (though without any kidnapping). 

Not that we wouldn't have enjoyed that

We suspect word of our discontent made it back to the board. Because today, out of the blue, a stack of cards showed up to be passed out to the staff. And the cards contained our recently purchased Chamber Bucks.

We concede that it is possible the Board planned to give us the bonus all along, but it seems more likely, given the mistreatment they've dealt in the last year, that they scrambled to appease their angry workers.

 

We are torn between sympathetic and completely creeped out

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:

She looks like a sad rat.
 

 

Happy Wagspll!

Saturday marked our annual holiday party. The Spoof and Speck party. It was also the weekend of the Tartarus Winter Cheer Event (barf), but there was no chance we were attending that bucket of idiocy. Instead we had a raucous evening of fun. Events included a gag gift exchange, heckling of Christmas specials, and cookie decorating. We, of course, can do nothing in a traditional manner. Observe some of the cookies we made:

A dying swordsman and the severed head of it's victim

A mustachioed vampire with a severed head

The victim of a rogue ninja

One of our coworkers, stabbed in the eye with a pencil

A lady of the evening, missing half her skull and with a ninja star in her belly

A cannibal and his victim

a child who broke a tooth

Poor Dale didn't know when he went to the beach that an insane swordsman was on the loose.