A very Merry Christmas from Spoof and Speck

May your stocking be free of evil squirrels.

 

Tantrum, much?

Last week we told you that Mosquito would not admit to serving apple cider at an event. She claimed the empty jugs were Spoof’s. Spoof, who had nothing to do with the event, did not clean up the empty jugs which were out on a counter along with other supplies Mosquito had used. Finally, someone got sick of looking at the mess and insisted that Mosquito clean it up. Mosquito spent the rest of the day stomping around and fuming about having to clean up her own mess.

 

What sort of gifts does he leave?

It’s time once again for Stuff Out of Context! This week’s line is:
I thought it was a goat. You thought it was Santa Claus.

It's Mo Monday!

It’s a Hundred Acre carnage. You’ll never look at Winnie the Pooh the same way again. Mo has destroyed this peaceful scene of childhood innocence with his violence and evil nature. Poor Piglet. Poor Tigger.

 

Maybe Mo put them there

A couple of weeks ago, Mosquito held an event at which she served cider. Nothing wrong with that, right? The problem is, she left the empty cider jugs out on the counter afterwards. When asked where the cider came from, Mosquito blamed Spoof (who, incidentally, has not served refreshments at anything in weeks). Now, to be clear, there is no problem with serving apple cider at Tartarus. The question was one of curiosity rather than animosity. Why then does Mosquito seem incapable of admitting to ANYTHING?

 

This farmer has a long growing season

It’s time once again for Stuff Out of Context! This week’s line is:
Did a bug plant eggs in me?

 

Are we at work or is this preschool?

Life at Tartarus continues to devolve. Comfort Inn has decided to redivide labor. Finally, someone realizes that the Hutt’s favorites get all of the best assignments while everyone else must do the bulk of the dirty work. Opie is not pleased. He’s not used to not getting everything he wants. He’s decided that the best way to handle the new policy is to ignore it and do whatever he pleases. When he gets caught at these shenanigans he complains to anyone who listens, including directors of other businesses like Tartarus. Maybe it’s just us, but it seems like the simplest way to fix these issue would be to fire Opie for insubordination. Since Comfort Inn seems unwilling to do so, we all must suffer through Opie’s tantrums.

 

Avert your eyes!

It’s time once again for Stuff Out of Context! This week’s line is:
Attention all! I am the fire alarm and as you can see I am clearly naked.

 

It's Mo Monday!

Sometimes you think you’ve won and life throws you a curve ball. We decided, for a change, to stand up to Mo and chased him around town. We thought we had him cornered and would end his tyranny once and for all. Only to discover that he’d made another ally. Mo and a lion together was just too much for us. You win another round, Mo.

 

Happy Thanksgiving from Spoof and Speck

Don't burn your turkey.

 

Garlic sold me insurance

It’s time once again for Stuff Out of Context! This week’s line is:
Ducks. Garlic. What’s the difference.

 

It's Mo Monday!

Again, Mo surprises us with hidden talents. Not only is he just plain mean, he’s a pretty mean drummer. He impressed all around with some sick beats today. If only he would pursue his music instead of mayhem.

 

That's just messed up

We found this in a store. Seriously, what kind of person would wear this shirt?

 

Some creatures can't get tan enough

It’s time once again for Stuff Out of Context! This week’s line is:
The flies are like, “Ooo, sunbathing.”

 

It's Mo Monday!

We’ve known for some time now that Mo has a fascination with enslaving animals to do his bidding. This weekend he hit the jackpot. A playground yielded these two amphibian sculptures. Mo’s army is growing.

A thought from Spoof and Speck

We work in an idiot nest.

Evian is a delicacy

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
Nothing's tastier than a water bottle.

 

It's Mo Monday!

Mo is fascinated of late with statuary. He was enthralled by this statue of a stone worker. He at turns wanted to: use the guy's hammer, boss him around, be carried around, and of course to eat him.

We say, always play with your food

We had a dinner party last night. After we ate, we were looking at the scraps left on our plates. They were perfect to make little pictures. We call them: Leftover People.

 

Who needs plates

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
I'm in charge so I can eat spaghetti out of whatever I want.
 

It's Mo Monday!

Our local park recently installed a giant urn as the focal point of the entrance. Mo applauds their sense of the macabre.
 

Happy Halloween!

Yeah, Halloween is tomorrow, but we're here today. As is tradition, we bring you some of our favorite "creepy" YouTube videos (mostly funny things featuring various monsters).

 

 

 

I like mustard on a bracelet

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
Don't you want to wear a hot dog on your wrist.
 

It's Mo Monday!

We could not convince Mo that this is not a real person. He insisted that all of us "regular" human beings had trapped a superior version of the species in a two-dimensional plane because we were threatened by his advanced conveyance. We think Mo has been watching too many sci-fi movies.

 

We rename you Dopie.

Today we bring you a conversation between Spoof and Opie. Buckle in.

Opie: Spoof, what day are you doing program Q.

Spoof: I think we've settled on Tuesday.

Opie: Does that mean you've sceduled it for Tuesday?

Spoof: Yeah, Tuesday means Tuesday.

Opie: So Tuesday then?

Vegetables are not human

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
They are the cucumbers; you are the people.

It's Mo Monday!

Just like all of us, Mo occasionally likes to get away from it all, to get back to nature. He says this tree helps him get back in touch with his primal, predatory instincts.
 

Can she do that?

We knew no good would come from our new boss. Today we were informed by email that we may not enter the staff lounge without prior permission. The STAFF LOUNGE. No entry for any reason without asking. We are not toddlers. And our staff lounge has always doubled as a work space. A place where we made posters and decorations for special programs. We explained this to Comfort Inn. She does not care. She says these things do not need to be done. They are to be done at the main desk or not at all. We are not to be away from the main desk without express permission from her. This seems problematic.

Rabies in the basement, cholera in the attic

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
Ooo, the rabies pencil might be downstairs.
 

It's Mo Monday!

In case you missed it, we wrote a song about Rabid Mo. What you do not know is, we actually wrote a different song well before we started blogging. A very simple song to the tune of Mary Had a Little Lamb. We found the original lyrics again this weekend and Mo was proud to pose with the song that was his inception.
 

We are concerned

It is official. We have a new boss at Tartarus. Let's call her Comfort Inn.

Comfort Inn does not seem to realize her own age. She dresses like a teenager headed to a honky-tonk themed night club (we know for a fact she is a grandmother).

Picture this, but older

One's personal style seems like a petty thing to complain about. Friends, that is just the tip of the iceberg.

Just two hours after her arrival, Comfort Inn began making huge changes to the way Tartarus is arranged and even to basic policy. We are used to bosses who take weeks to change even the smallest things (you may recall the hour-long discussion about where to keep a stapler). All of Tartarus is reeling. We are concerned what may be in our future.

Superman is an elephant

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
Zebra is pretty much Wonder Woman.

It's Mo Monday!

Every now and then, Mo's natural curiosity gets him into trouble. We warned him not to investigate the hole in this post, but he would not be swayed. Sure enough, he found himself stuck fast. 
 

Speck is not impressed

We have two complaints about Tartarus today, both of them about Mineola.

1. Mineola insists that Speck smile all the time. Only Speck. Mineola herself spends much of her day scowling. The constant smiling makes Speck look like a lunatic.

2. When Speck completed a requested task today, Mineola responded with "good job' in the same tone which one uses with a puppy that has successfully piddled outside.

 

We keep the cold cuts in a shovel

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
Take the cheese off of the broom and go away.

It's Mo Monday!

We often see Mo's violence. It isn't often that we see his sensitive side. When we came across this small piano, Mo shocked all around by hopping up onto the keys and playing a lovely tune. Of course, then he asked people to tip him with severed fingers....

Could it have been more obvious

Observe this conversation from today.

Speck: Shoes, there's a man on the phone who'd like to speak to you about purchasing his new book.

Shoes: Um, well, I guess...Can you just take a message? We're not really in a position to be taking on anything new right now (LIE - Our budget has just been cleared and we're under instruction to seek new products) and Mineola is on the other line and I don't want to tie up both lines right now (HUGE LIE - With our phone system you can see all of the lines. The only one engaged was the one with the salesman).

Shoes, your pants are on fire.

 

He doesn't care for staples

It's time once again for Stuff Out of Context! Today's line is:
I have to glue the lumberjack.

It's Mo Monday!

Mo finds himself currently trapped in a window well. Is this the end of the shenanigan of Rabid Mo?

Survey says - Not on your life

Happy Spoof, Mad Spoof, Good Spoof, Bad Spoof.

Recently we conducted an experiment. We took a little note book and labeled the first page "Good Spoof and Speck." The idea was that we would put a star sticker on the page for each spontaneous kind thing we said to/about one of our coworkers or about Tartarus. At the end of the week, this was the result:

Notice anything?

A few weeks later we labeled a different page on the book "Bad Spoof and Speck." This time we would put in a sticker for each spontaneous negative thing we said about one of our coworkers or Tartarus. At the end of one day, this was the result:

That's 99 stars if you don't feel like counting them up.

We think we have a serious problem.