It's Mo Monday!

We think Mo likes books. Even more than he likes books, though, he likes people who like books. Specifically, he likes to eat them.

He may like to eat the books too

Just look at him, posed to nibble on some fingers.

What's in a name

We've given a lot of nicknames for our coworkers and a handful for patrons of Tartarus. Lest you think we are some sort of freaks who get their kicks out of mocking their coworkers, we thought we'd share some names we've given to people we've encountered in our real lives.

Hawaii people - The Hawaii people are seasonal residents. They are very loud and spend all of their time talking about their lives in Hawaii and how they like it better around Tartarus. 

The Nids - These people gave their kids weird names. The only one we can remember ever is named Leonid. So, we have dubbed the other kids Beonid and Cleonid. Collectively, the family is the nids.

Turtle - This person walks like a turtle and chews like a turtle. 

Magical Trevor - Spoof's neighbor. He comes and goes without ever being seen. Seriously, we pulled into the drive - no Trevor. We looked out the window two minutes later - BAM there's Trevor's truck. Magic.
Like this:

Creepy Clown Guy - He walks around in striped socks, Hawaiian shirts, and a porkpie hat. And he's creepy.

Godzilla feet - We've seen this guy walking around. He stomps around like he is Godzilla.

The Furries - The furries are a group of guys who protest something near Tartarus. Once a week. For two hours. And we don't really know what they are protesting. They just all have a lot of hair. One of the furries is actually a sometimes patron at Tartarus whom we call Oh Frank. He is so named because any time we talk about him the conversation ends with the exclamation, "Oh, Frank"

Fire, brimstone, and ... monkeys?

This is a particularly dark Out of Context.

This week's line:
Bad things happen in monkey holes.

That's fire on the left

The Amazing Spoof and Speck

This morning we made our way to the main floor of Tartarus. We had just arrived at work and Tartarus wasn't open yet. This is typical. Also typical was the fact that Zebra was there a good five minutes ahead of us and getting to work, even though he wasn't technically being paid yet. 

Of course.

As we started working Zebra called over to us. "Oh, Spoof and Speck, you know the Hutt isn't here today, right."

"Um, no," we said. "How would we know that."

"Oh, the Hutt called and left a message. It is sick today," he said, reading from a note.

So, if he was reading this message from a not and had arrived ahead of us, how would we possibly know already? Is it possible that we are mind-readers and don't even know it?

We are amazing, apparently

It's Mo Monday!

You can't say Mo doesn't have a playful side. We caught him today using these hangers like a jungle gym.

That Mo. What a silly guy.

What would that look like?

It's been a little while since we talked about our patrons, what with all the insanity that has been coming from the staff. This story, though, just had to be shared.

The other day, Spoof took a phone call.

The fellow on the phone said, "I have a question for you."

Said Spoof, "Okay."

The fellow said "Do you have the ability to print on invisible paper?"

After an awkward pause Spoof said, "Ummm.....Invisible?"

The fellow, very seriously, said, "Yes, invisible."

Spoof sort of snorted. "No!"

"Okay," said the fellow amiably and hung up.

What just happened here?

 

Wombage returns

Do you remember Wombage, our book club for everyone?

Here's the poster

We're bringing Wombage back. Here's the promo.

Does your fetus love to read? Does Great Grandma have a stack of thrillers she's been wanting to get through? Then the Wombage read-a-thon is the event for you. 
How many hours will your fetus read? Find out during Wombage 2014.

Need an explanation? Keep scrolling

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Mosquito has a new obsession. One of Mosquito's kid's groups had a read-a-thon fund raiser last month. Mosquito loved it so much that she wants to have read-a-thons for other age groups. Like once a month. That's a lot of a-thons.