It's Mo time!

Is that really a nut Mo is eating? Or could it be something more sinister? It looks suspiciously like fingers to us.

 

What does tomorrow mean?

A few weeks ago we held an even. It was a pretty big deal so we took a number of pictures to use for our website, Facebook, etc. During the event, our friendly neighborhood newspaper editor showed up. Apparently he couldn't be bothered to stick around and take his own photos, so he asked if he could use ours. 

"Okay," says Speck. "We'll put them on a flash drive for you."

"Great," says Stepeepen. "I'll pick it up tomorrow, sort through them, and bring the drive right back."

Not wanting to inconvenience him, we had the drive ready for him at opening the next morning. And then we waited. And waited. All day, no sign of Stepeepen. The next day, same thing. Meanwhile, the deadline for the paper (it's a weekly) had passed. Finally, three and a half days after he was supposed to show, Stepeepen finally came for the drive. 

End of the story? Not even close. He kept the flash drive for most of a week. So much for bringing it right back. Luckily the drive was a spare. 

Eventually, he did bring the flash drive back and he did use photos for the paper. Two of them. Two weeks of hassle for two photos and a couple of lines in the paper.

Unimpressed

Jidiot

When you're in a business and hear an announcement that the place is closing soon, what do you do? Do you take your time, make yourself comfortable? Or do you, like a sane person, make your way out the door? Worst are the people who hear the announcement "we're now closed" and still wander around. 

Tonight's victim led Spoof and Speck to coin the term "jidiot" (This is a combination of jerk and idiot, FYI). We watched the jidiot wander around for a solid twenty minutes, picking things up casually and setting them back down again. About five minutes before closing, the jidiot left. Then, as we were letting a straggler out five solid minutes after we closed, the jidiot zipped back in having "lost my keys." We stood there, dumb struck, as the moron wandered around, loudly proclaiming where she had been. Our coworker Gomer followed her around, helping look. We heard jidiot say the keys might be in her car but she thought she better check inside first "before you close." What made her think we were still open?! The doors were locked and the lights were off. She left a few minutes later still with no keys. Turns out they were in her car after all.

The Everyday Adventures of JimmyDuck: Inaction Figures

Ever have trouble keeping track of your boss's location? We have this problem all of the time. Even though the Hutt practically lives in the offices, we never know whether its taking phone calls or even which office its in. This became enough of a problem that the Hutt came up with a solution: the doll. The doll is like one of those artist's dummies, poseable and made out of wood.

 

Picture something like this

The idea is the doll will take one of three poses: out of the building, in the building but unavailable, in the main office and taking calls. In theory, this is not a horrible idea. In practice it has several fatal flaws:

1. The doll is kept at the main desk, down a flight of stairs from the offices. This means that the Hutt has to come downstairs to change the pose. One would think that you could just tell the people at the desk where you will be, thus rendering the doll redundant.

2. No one remembers what the poses mean. There is no guide anywhere. Additionally, those three poses don't cover all the possibilities for the Hutt's location and availability.

3. The Hutt rarely actually changes the doll. Seriously, it was in the "out of the building" pose for three weeks straight. More recently, our coworkers have taken to contorting the doll into freakish poses. No one notices.

And most importantly:

4. The doll makes us feel like preschoolers. We are all college educated adults. We understand words like "I'll be out of the office until 4". The doll makes us think you consider us all idiots.

Yeah, you might be out of the office but my brain is still here.

Swooping down from the sky

Spoof and Speck, in addition to working day jobs and being pretty darn funny, also happen to be artists. Every now and then, we'll be sharing our art with you here. 

This particular painting is a modified magazine page.

 

 

Do you think it's going after the guy or the dog?

Want to see more like this? Have a specific art request? Let us know in the comments.

Here comes Mo

We had another Rabid Mo sighting today. Take a look at this:

He's looking hungry, isn't he?

The spree continues

Our friend the murder goose has another victim in his sights. It's no surprise that he's now after good ol' Shoes.

Shoes tells us that we are no longer allowed to use a particular desk in one of our work spaces. We're told that co-worker Buck has been complaining that we're always taking up that space when he needs it. 

It so happens that we are friends with Buck. Concerned that we've offended him, Spoof apologizes for the inconvenience. Buck, it turns out, has no idea what we are talking about. He never made a complaint and has no desire to use the desk in question.

We don't object to being told not to use the desk (even though no one ever uses it). It's the lying that has us and the murder goose upset. 

Next time, don't lay your complaints on other people.